Hard Core English Teacher

Hard Core Prom Request

2012-03-02T11:20:00.000-05:00

This morning a student made this Hard Core teacher proud. With a few plastic cups and a fence he came up with a new way to ask a girl to go tot he prom with him.

By the way, the answer was yes.

So this inspired me to Google some more hard prom requests. I found:

one kid talked his teacher into added a slide into her PowerPoint notes that asked another student to the prom
one guy used a series of You Tube videos to convince UFC Octagon girl and Maxim model to go to the prom with him
one student asked date out by spelling out his request with sushi
and one guy even had a professional baseball team cheerleader throw the girl a t-shirt during the game that was specially designed to read, "Prom?"

So how about it? Have you witnessed any creative prom requests?

Fancy Fencing

2012-02-27T15:31:00.000-05:00

What is cooler than sword fighting?

Students sword fighting in class, of course. What could be cooler than that?

English teachers teaching students how to sword fight in class. Talk about points for originality from the administration. Provided, of course, that none of your students actually die in the process.

Now, I know the more common core teachers out there are saying to themselves (or out loud to the computer screen), "How can I teach students how to sword fight?" and the lesser core teachers are saying "Why would I teach students how to sword fight?"

The hard core teachers have stopped reading the post and have started sharpening the sword they keep proudly on the wall behind their desk. Don't worry about them, they'll rejoin us in a minute. To you others, I'll answer the questions. First, no fear. I will instruct you in the fine arts of sword fighting. Second, why wouldn't you? But to be more precise, because of the countless years you've spent having students read Shakespeare out loud and cringing when the narrator boringly reads these two words:

They fight.

These words are usually read in a monotone voice and are followed by an equally monotone voice saying the next line. It's boring. However, if the students realize that these two words encompass a huge choreographed fight scene, then they might be more interested. It will cost you at least one day of instruction, perhaps a little more, but it is worth it. They will remember your drama unit over all others.

ARTSEDGE suggests using it with Hamlet, but I've used it with both Hamlet and Romeo and Juliet. Frankly, any Shakespeare play that has a sword fight scene will work.

Touche, pussycat!

O.K., how do you teach sword fighting? It's easy. Go to ARTSEDGE. This link will take you straight to their sword fighting lessons where you will learn first, second, third, and fourth position, terms like: Relevé, Plié, and Demi-plié (look at that - French! Cross Curriculum learning! - not to mention that these are ballet moves too so we incorporate dance and P.E.) as well as en guarde, salute, and that word for when the guy does a fancy circle motion with the sword and sends the other guy's sword flying away.

Need to get your students in the mood? Try showing one of these sword fighting videos:

From Die Another Day (James Bond)

And from Pirates of the Caribbean

What we did was teach the students the moves, let them play it out a bit and then they choreographed a fight scene and acted it out. Some of the kids were less than wholehearted, but quite a few put a lot into it. We often get props, cartwheels, leaps across the room, etc. Some students come up with a story to show why they are fighting and some join groups up to have a large battle royal feel.

What do we use for swords? Well, in class we take large paper (I got some 11" x 17" paper for free long ago and can't use it in the copiers) and roll them up tight (about 2 to 3 sheets). For those who make to our next level (we take the best fight scenes from each period and let them have a competition) we use wooden sticks that I bought at Home Depot and cut to size. Just be careful, whatever you do, and remember that play swords are weapon facsimiles and are probably banned at your school.

By the way, before you cop out of this fantastic lesson plan by saying, "You don't know my students. They won't be able to handle this lesson," you should know that I have done this lesson with honors kids who did great and low level behaviorally challenged kids, who also did great.

So, grab your sword and get hard core with your Shakespeare unit!

Tom Swifties

2012-02-22T16:03:00.002-05:00

If you've been a boy scout or you have a son who is one, then you are familiar with Boy's Life magazine. In the back of every issue are two pages of jokes (which I have to painstakingly hear everyone of them read aloud slowly each month). There are always a few Tom Swifties in the mix.

What? You are unfamiliar with Tom Swifty? Well, my friend, let me introduce you to the capital of the state of corniness. Tom Swifty is a sentence that has Tom saying something. You finish it off with - Tom said (insert clever adverb here that not only shows how he said it, but also creates a pun). here is an example:

"I'm waiting to see the doctor," said Tom patiently.

The purists will tell you that it must be an adverb, but those lesser hard core teachers might settle for making the verb be the pun, like this:

"It's twelve noon," Tom chimed in.

However, this is the blog for Hard Core English teachers, not little sissy English teachers, so none of that non-adverb mess here.

What's the point? you might ask. Well, if you have a group of students who do not know adverbs, this is not a bad way of learning them. You can use them as examples and even have them fill in the adverb in a little clever game (such as: "I've gained thirty pounds," said Tom ________.). The fun part about that is that they might provide a better answer than the adverb "heavily" that you were looking for. If nothing else, you can use them for practice with quotation marks or puns or just plain as example sentences to find parts of speech with.

Here are some of my personal favorite:

"This boat is leaking," said Tom balefully.

"..." said Tom blankly.

"I need a pencil sharpener," said Tom bluntly.

"I think I'll use a different font," said Tom boldly.

"Rowing hurts my hands," said Tom callously.

"My nightlight went out,” said Tom darkly.

"I can no longer hear anything," said Tom deftly.

"There power’s out at school!" said Tom delightedly.

"Now I can do some painting," said Tom easily.

"I'm about to hit the golf ball," Tom forewarned.

"We have no oranges," Tom said fruitlessly.

"For what we are about to receive, may the Lord make us truly thankful," said Tom gracefully.

"I only have diamonds, clubs and spades," said Tom heartlessly.

"Nay!" said Tom hoarsely.

"Boy, that's an ugly hippopotamus!" said Tom hypocritically.

“I see," said Tom icily.

"That little devil didn't tell the truth," Tom implied.

"I swallowed some of the glass from that broken window," Tom said painfully.

"I wish I had something to write with," Tom said pensively.

"3.14159265," Tom said piously.

"I've never had a car accident," said Tom recklessly.

"Hey, you're on my foot!" said Tom standoffishly.

"Stop, horse! Stop!" cried Tom woefully.

I got these from http://www.fun-with-words.com/tom_swifties.html. They had about 400 of them there. If you have any good ones (and by good I certainly mean corny), leave them as a comment.

Romeo and Juliet Rip Offs

2012-02-20T06:00:00.004-05:00

It is only fitting. William Shakespeare borrowed his storyline from somewhere else, so it just stands to reason that others would borrow his. Shakespeare probably got the idea from either a poem by Arthur Brooke called "The Tragicall Historye of Romeus and Iuliet," written in 1562 or from The Palace of Pleasure whichis a collection of stories written before 1580. One of those stories was "Romeo and Juliet."

Even these two guys borrowed their ideas from others before them. Giulietta e Romeo is a novella by Matteo Bandello written in 1554 or A Story Found of Two Noble Lovers by Luigi Da Porto in 1530.
Heck, even these guys aren't originals. "Pyramus and Thysbe" is a Greek myth that predates them all.
Anyway, here is a look at more modern stealings, I mean, borrowings of this famous story.

Let's start with the classic.

West Side Story

Dancing gangs. What's not to love?

Romanoff and Juliet

Cold War love. He's a commie, she's an upstanding capitalist. Two countries try to keep them apart. The guy in the cut out box just looks creepy.

Romeo Must Die

Now we're talking. Romeo and Juliet with martial arts action! Yeah baby!

Underworld

Werewolves vs. Vampires - and not the sissy sparkling ones either!

Romeo X Juliet

Romeo and Juliet in an ongoing anime series.

China Girl

What? Another gang reference? This time between Chinese gangs and Italian gangs.

Step Up

More dancing. I miss the gangs now.

High School Musical

Now we're really going downhill.

Gnomeo and Juliet

O.K., I think we've hit rock bottom.

So how about it? Can you think of any other movies that would the Romeo and Juliet story line?

What Do I Do?

2012-02-17T13:54:00.000-05:00

Need Some Passages?

2012-02-15T15:46:00.000-05:00

If you are like me, you'd rather avoid the text book when possible. I don't have anything against textbooks, but my students do and we don't tend to have enough to go around anyway. There is no money for us to buy more and it doesn't look like were are going to get any anytime soon. Add on top of that, the last time my school bought text books, they opted to not get any grammar books.

So, I often create my own stuff for grammar practice. This can be tedious sometimes. That's why I like to use http://anecdotage.com. There are thousands of little anecdotes just waiting to be ~~stolen~~ borrowed. I find one I want to use and I put in the mistakes I am trying to have them learn to correct. It's simple and it's easy.

Another one is http://www.aesopfables.com/ which, as you can probably tell from the name, is a collection of Aesop's fables. Good, easy to modify passages.

If you have a site similar to these, let me know by posting links to them in the comments section.

Art Thou Bored?

2012-02-03T05:54:00.001-05:00

It's old and grainy, but what a blast from the past (for me, of course - you are probably to young to remember the joys of a good old fashioned Macho Man Slim Jim commercial)

iGlobe

2012-02-01T10:03:00.000-05:00

Teaching Shakespeare and want a new way to show what The Globe probably look like? Try this site: http://www.shakespearesglobe.com/about-us/virtual-tour

This is the web site of a theatre that is modeled after The Globe. You can see it from different angles and it gives you a 360 degree view of the place. You can put the camera on stage, on the ground, or in the stands. Plus, if you move your mouse on it, you can look up and down or speed up the view. Very cool site!

Elements of Stylin'

2012-01-27T06:00:00.001-05:00

I am totally ~~stealing~~ borrowing this post from Mighty Red Pen. It is just too funny to pass up.

Watch this rap created by none other than Strunk and White themselves!

Up in the Sky - It's a Plane, It's Bird, No It's... Grammar Girl!

2012-01-24T12:30:00.000-05:00

Grammar Girl

This site won second place in the grammar blog competition of 2011. I really like it. It is a part of the Quick and Dirty Tips network of web sites. I haven't checked out the others yet, but I probably will soon to see if they are anything like this site - which they probably are since Grammar Girl is the founder of the Quick and Dirty Tips network.

Who is Grammar Girl? Mignon Fogarty. She used to be a magazine and technical writer. Now she maintains these sites and goes around giving lectures.

Grammar Girl takes a grammar question and gives a quick answer. To give an idea of what kind of tips they offer, here are five tips I found just doing a quick scan of the site:

Omitting "That"
Specially vs. Especially
Lay vs. Lie
Ending a sentence with a preposition
Blond or Blonde?

There is also a podcast of the site that talks about things other than what is on the site. You can keep up to date by liking her Facebook page. You can also subscribe to a newsletter that does not have the same tips as talked about in the podcast or the blog.

Break down review:

Tips that range from beginner to expert

Quick and easy to read

Multiple formats

Final Grade: A+

Nevermore?

2012-01-19T10:08:00.000-05:00

I just saw this headline today and thought I'd share it. Here's a little background information first:

Ever since the 1940s, a mysterious man dressed in black with a white scarf and a wide brimmed hat shows up at Edgar Allen Poe's grave on January 19th, 1809 (Poe's birthday). He leaves three roses and a half-empty (or is it half-full?) bottle of cognac. Crowds gather to watch this event each year. He is called the Poe Toaster and unfortunately has not been seen for the past three years.

To read the whole story, check out the article: http://apnews.myway.com/article/20120119/D9SC19EG0.html

Dawn Song

2012-01-18T11:04:00.000-05:00

Are you looking for something new to teach with Romeo and Juliet? I might be able to help out. In the morning after they get married, we have this exchange of dialogue:

JULIET
1 Wilt thou be gone? it is not yet near day:
2 It was the nightingale, and not the lark,
3 That pierced the fearful hollow of thine ear;
4 Nightly she sings on yon pomegranate-tree:
5 Believe me, love, it was the nightingale.

ROMEO
6 It was the lark, the herald of the morn,
7 No nightingale. Look, love, what envious streaks
8 Do lace the severing clouds in yonder east.
9 Night's candles are burnt out, and jocund day
10 Stands tiptoe on the misty mountain tops.
11 I must be gone and live, or stay and die.

This is and example of aube. This is a literary term that comes from the French. If you want a simpler term, you can use dawn song. This was really popular in French medieval poetry. It is a song of sadness and regret as two lovers must part at dawn. If you are daring, you could have your students compose one themselves, however, that could be scary. Maybe they could compose an aube to their nice cozy bed that they left that morning.

Just a thought.

I Pity the Fool!

2012-01-13T09:51:00.000-05:00

My super cool school librarian (Dr. T) turned me on to the book Fool. It's written by Christopher Moore and it is absolutely hilarious. There are few books that I actually laugh out loud while reading and this is one of them. The premise of Fool (and the reason for including it on an English teacher blog) is the story of King Lear as told by Pocket, the king's jester. I've never read King Lear, I'm embarrassed to say, but I had no problems following the story and I bet that the story would be even funnier if I had read the actual play. The characters are well developed (well, they should be - after all, the great Bard has already developed them) and the writing style to smooth. This is not a good book as a supplemental book in class, but it is a great read that any English teacher worth his/her salt would enjoy.

The only negative thing about the book is the level of raunchy humor. The court jester is, after all, a lowly class and male at that so his humor often focuses on the act of procreation. The language can be a bit rough in that respect. This may turn some readers off. Not us at HCET, though. We can take it.

Christopher Moore is a prolific writer, so if you like this book, you have yourself a whole slew of books to start reading. He's got some Twilight parody out there as well titled Bloodsucking Friends: A Love Story which he follows up with You Suck: A Love Story. Probably a good read for those of you sissy vampire fans out there.

Over all grade:

Great humor, smooth writing, a new twist on an old story, and the guts to tackle a remake of a Shakespeare work (come on, that's got to be daunting for an author) all go in to making this book a must read. The amount of raunchy humor in places where it was not always needed is a bit of a take away, but not enough.

A-

Free Food!

2012-01-11T15:25:00.000-05:00

Well, not for you, but for people who need it. I'm sure most of you have run across this site before but for those that haven't, you really need to check out Free Rice.

Even if this site didn't help to organize food for the needy the more people use it, it still would be a great resource for English teachers. It starts the player off at a low level and adjusts to the words to match the skill level of the player. This can be fun if students are working in a lab, have lap tops, or on a Smart Board. Also, for every word the player gets right, ten grains of rice gets donated to the needy.

If you want to make a class competition out of it, keep track of how much rice each student donates and add it up. Then see if the next period can beat them. Competition and bragging rights can really motivate a class. Need a goal? According to Producer's Rice Mill (http://www.producersrice.com/rice/facts.html), there are 29,000 grains of rice in a one pound bag. That might be a long term goal to reach!

The only bad thing that I can think of is that the words are in isolation and not in context. However, the game makes no pretense to teach context clues, just pure word knowledge.

So, quick recap -

Students think they get a break from real work when in fact they are studying vocabulary
Teachers get a break from standing in front of the class yapping all day
Hungry people get food

This is a no-brainer!

Grade: A

A Novel Idea

2011-12-28T10:20:00.000-05:00

Well, Christmas has come and gone and as I emerge from the discarded wrapping paper I have to smile at the Kindle Fire I am holding in my hand.

Now, if you are a tech buff, you probably have an assortment of things you like and don't like about the fire, but for me, I'm very happy with it. Yeah, my fat fingers don't always trigger the right buttons when I tap the screen, but there are several things that I really like about it. One of them involves school.

I know that some teachers go out of their way to find books to put on reading lists that do not have a Spark Notes companion. Now, I teach the lower levels and so I don't worry about Spark Notes. Heck, I'd love it if my students were motivated enough to pull up Spark Notes and I have provided links to Spark Notes from time to time on my class page. None of my students bother to use it. However, if you are one of the teachers that wants to find the book that must be actually read without the shortcuts, you've been plagued by lack of access. Most books available to students in schools are found on Spark Notes. Now, however, with the Kindle (or Nook, or any other e-reader) there are a host of free books. These books are still good in their own right, but not popular enough to get Spark Notes billing. A teacher could easily scroll through the free book lists and offer these books for the next reading project. Not all students have access to a Kindle or Nook, but many do and this could seriously enhance the selection of books on your list.

Check with your school librarian. I bet he/she already has, or has plans to have, an e-reader available to check out to students. You can suggest certain titles to get loaded up on them for your students. I've already loaded up a host of free mythology, Sherlock Holmes, and Edgar Rice Burroughs books. And of course, when you're done, you can play a rousing round of Angry Birds.

I'm sure that there are several more uses for these things. I'm just exploring mine. If anyone has found good uses for e-readers in their classrooms, I'd love to hear it. Leave a comment!

I'm Still Not Convinced

2011-12-19T06:48:00.000-05:00

This Is a Test. This Is Only a Test.

2011-12-14T03:19:00.001-05:00

A school friend of mine sent this to me:

This test is not easy.

The website reports that college professors average about 55%.

Click below and have some fun!

Intercollegiate Studies Institute - Educating for Liberty

So I went to the link. I took the test. It will take about 5-ish minutes. Try it out and see what you think. It is government and civics based, but as we should be teaching some of these government documents and as we are leaders in these children's lives, we really ought to be up on most of this. There seems to be no political bias one way or the other.

Take it and post your scores in the comment section if you don't mind. I made a 27 out of 33. That comes out to an 81.82%. I thought I would have done better, but oh well. I am properly chagrined. However, the site says that college professors score on average 55% and that politicians score less than that. I hope (but am not holding my breath) that this is not true.

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

2011-12-12T02:27:00.003-05:00

My dad sent this to me. I thought I'd pass it on. This is lesson in Brazil. The cell phone goes off. Now you don't need to speak Portuguese to understand how this teacher deals with the interruption.

Haven't you thought of doing this at least once?

Maybe later we'll get into a discussion on how to use the cell phone as a positive force in the classroom. For now, however, we'll just enjoy the video.

Grammar Challenge

2011-12-08T10:35:00.002-05:00

Take the time to answer this grammar question tot he best of your ability:

Now, scroll down a little to figure out the answer with me.

If you are like me, you've always been taught that this is wrong. And you've avoided doing it so as not to look unlearned. However, according to Dr. Grammar, this bit of information is a bit incorrect.

And or But to begin a sentence?

"Everybody agrees that it's all right to begin a sentence with and, and nearly everybody admits to having been taught at some past time that the practice was wrong" (Merriam-Webster's Dictionary of English Usage). In addition, "many of us were taught that no sentence should begin with 'but. ' If that's what you learned, unlearn it — there is no stronger word at the start. It announces total contrast with what has gone before, and the reader is primed for the change" (William Zinsser qtd. inMerriam-Webster's Dictionary of English Usage). Using and or but at the beginning of a sentence makes the tone of the writing more informal — like a conversation. Care needs to be taken to ensure a sentence beginning with and or but doesn't become a sentence fragment (Fogarty, Grammar Girl's Quick and Dirty Tips for Better Writing 80).

So, do you agree with this? Have you heard it before? Or am I the only one who thought this was wrong?

Well, It's What We've Been Saying All Along

2011-12-07T06:20:00.000-05:00

The other day a friend of mine sent me this link to a news article about a person of influence that took a standardized test being given to 10th graders in his state. The state is New York, but does it really matter? All state tests are somewhat the same, especially now as we move toward Common Core. I think it's a good read. Try it at:

When an Adult Took Standardized Tests Forced on Kids

Now, I'm not totally against standardized testing. I think it is a necessary evil. Some teachers just don't teach the material they are supposed to teach because they don't like it or don't want to change the plans that they've used for the past 20 years or maybe just because they are incompetent. Then it is unfair for a kid to work hard in a class, learn a lot, and get a C while another kid did not learn squat and ends up with an A because they had the "easy" teacher.

Any thoughts?

Yoda English

2011-12-05T10:51:00.001-05:00

Check out these quotes from the master of wisdom, Yoda:

Named must your fear be before banish it you can.
Impossible to see the light, the future is.
Named must your fear be before banish it you can.
Always two there are, a master and an apprentice.
Lost a planet, Master Obi-Wan has. How embarrassing… how embarrassing.
Meditate on this, I will.
Around the survivors, a perimeter create!
Destroy the Sith, we must.
Not if anything to say about it, I have!

Of course, any teacher worth his/her salt has seen the Star Wars movies countless times, as I am sure you have as well. As a result, we are all used to Yoda-speak.

Why bring this up in an English teacher blog? A new literary term teach you I do.

Anastrophe - this is the deliberate inversion of the common order of words.

This is almost always used in poetry to make a rhyme. It is used quite a bit in "Jabberwocky." As any literary device, it should not be over used. Use it to make a point. Even Yoda does not speak this way every time. In fact, most of his best known quotes are normal syntax.

However, I do have a serious problem with the little green jedi. It is in this quote at the end of the third movie:

"Into exile I must go. Failed, I have."

Why? Grab Kenobi, launch a secret assault! All that talk he had about how fear leads to the dark side and the first time the going gets tough, he goes in hiding. Coward.

Oh well. Go and be a true geek by teaching this term to all your fellow teachers today at lunch. They'll thank you for it. Promise, I do.

Gone in 60 Seconds

2011-11-30T16:11:00.000-05:00

There is a web site called 60 Second Recap. It takes a book and gives a quick run down of it without giving away too much. A student could easily read it in less than a minute. This could be a good starting ground if you are allowing students to pick a book off of a list. If they don't have the book you are looking for, just request it. Other thoughts would be to have students write their own for class.

Check it out and see what you think.

It's the truth. I Promise!

2011-11-16T02:59:00.000-05:00

I have a literary term challenge for you that have bested the best people I know. See how you stack up (because I really want the answer to this!).

The other day I picked up The Princess of Mars. It is the first book in the John carter of Mars series written by Edgar Rice Burroughs (of Tarzan fame). I love Victorian (well, he writes right after the period, but you couldn't tell it) science fiction, so it just made sense for to pick it up. The foreword is by Burroughs and is about how Burroughs knows the protagonist personally. He goes on to say that John Carter spent many of his last days writing, but never allowed anyone to see it. Finally, upon his death, Burroughs was responsible for seeing to all the details of his burial. One of them was to keep his writings secret for 21 years. So as you read The Princess of Mars, it is supposedly a true record of events. Burroughs does not write it, he only presents the autobiography as it was given to him 21 years ago.

So my question is - what is the name of this literary device? Surely it has one. I have been given a few possibilities but all fall short. It is also not the only book that uses this device. The most famous is probably Dracula by Bran Stoker.

In the beginning of that book, Stoker writes this author's note:

How these papers have been placed in sequence will be made manifest in the reading of them. All needless matters have been eliminated, so that a history almost at variance with the possibilities of latter-day belief may stand forth as simple fact. There is throughout no statement of past things wherein memory may err, for all the records chosen are exactly contemporary, given from the standpoints and within the range of knowledge of those who made them.

Of course, he actually wrote it, but he chose to present it as if it were fact. The neat thing about this that when you teach a book like this, there are always a few students who believe that he is telling the truth in his note. There is a neat little blog called The Dracula Innocence Project that takes the idea that this is a true story and goes with it. Unfortunately, the author quit early on, but the posts that were made are quite entertaining.

The Spy Who Loved Me by Ian Fleming is also written in this format. Here, some woman approach Ian Fleming and presented him a manuscript about an encounter she had with a spy remarkably like James Bond. Supposedly all Fleming does is use the name James Bond in the novel, but the rest is a true story. I've also heard the Tarzan books are also written that way.

So again I challenge you to tell me the name of this particular device. Here are the terms that have been presented to me:

Factuality Hook and Author as Editor - however, both of these were made up by local high school teachers as a good name for the term if one doesn't exist yet.

Epistolary Novel - This is a novel written as letters, but does not fit the "this is a real story and I promise I didn't write it" technique. I think the person who suggested this one was thinking of Dracula, but not the others. Frankenstein is an epistolary novel but doesn't pretend to be actual letters.

Verisimilitude - This somewhat fits, since it means the appearance of truth. But the term is usually used in reference to a work that is fiction but every thing in it could have happened.

I have a literary term dictionary, but as is the problem with all dictionaries, you must know the word if you are going to look it up. I'm going through it and am finding some pretty neat terms, but not the one I'm interested in yet.

So, what do you think it is? Can you give me any other book titles that are written this way? Leave a response with your best guess or title.

The Importance of Good Grammar

2011-11-15T05:58:00.002-05:00

I know, I Know. There should be a question mark rather than a period after fraternity.

Coaching vs. Teaching

2011-11-10T12:27:00.000-05:00

When I was but a wee little college student, I remember taking a class called The Foundations of Teaching English (at least I think that is the title). There were only two guys in the class. The professor was a female. I remember that she treated the other guy and me with disdain often. She rarely discussed topics with us, but would spend a lot of time with the female students. I chose to take the path of least resistance and just get my work done and be done with the class. The other guy, however, chose a different take. He asked her point blank in class one time about why she treated us so differently. Her response? She said that males were hired as coaches, not teachers and that she was tired of women working hard to actually be teachers while guys didn't have to know anything.

I was floored. I was spending my time studying to be an English teacher. I didn't mind coaching as well, but I was going to be an English teacher. I just chalked it up to sour grapes as I guessed she felt that she had been bypassed for a job because she didn't coach.

In my initial rounds for applying for my first teaching job, I applied to a local high school that I knew needed a swim coach. I swam all my life and swam in college as well. I went to the interview and did well. I had smiles from the principal and the English department chair. They even asked me how would I teach semicolons to make it interesting to low level kids. Quite an unfair question and I don't remember my response as much as I remember their reactions being favorable to my response. The interview was over an hour and when they were done talking with me there was a good feel in the room. I knew I had a good chance at the job. Then the principal asked me if there was anything else I would like to add. I mentioned that I knew that the current swim coach was leaving and I wouldn't mind coaching the team if they needed someone. BOOM! The whole atmosphere changed. She looked at me and coldly said, "We're interviewing for teaching positions here. Not coaching. We'll call you if we're going to offer you the job." Needless to say, they didn't call me.

Over the years of being a teacher, I have noticed that many teachers have an attitude towards coaches as being more interested in their coaching than their subject. I'm curious about it. Recently it has come up again as I heard some teachers in one department really lambaste coaches. Why is this attitude prevalent? I would think that teachers would like anyone who helps students succeed. Look at these facts:

Female high school athletes are: 92% less likely to get involved with drugs, 80% less likely to get pregnant, 3 times more likely to graduate than non-athletes.
Male students athletes are less likely to drop out of school by a 2 to 1 ratio.
Student athletes' grades tend to be higher during season than out of season.
Non-student athletes are: 49% more likely to use drugs and 37% more likely to become teen parents
Student athletes have higher attendance rates.
Student athletes have higher GPAs than non student athletes

So tell me, why would there be a stereotype against teacher coaches? Is it jealousy over the amount of attention they are getting? Is it the extra pay? Most coaches don't get very much compared to the time spent away from their families. Do you think that most coaches don't care about their subject matter?

Please leave me your thoughts, whether you are for or anti school sports. I would love to hear any argument. I'm a coach, so I'll see things one way, but my self esteem is high enough that I won't take anything said personally.

Hang It All!

2011-11-09T16:10:00.000-05:00

I'm working on a post, but swim team season has just started so I am finding my time wrapped up in the initial hustle and bustle of the season. For now, here is a cartoon to keep you happy:

And the Winner Is...

2011-10-31T16:00:00.003-04:00

A few posts ago, I told you about the Grammar Blog contest hosted by Grammar.net. It seems like a fun little contest. The best thing for me is that I now see a list of grammar blogs that I knew nothing about. I am going to try over the year to give a short review of each one.

Well, last week the winners were announced. It appears that two blogs got disqualified and had to be removed from the running. Apparently the comments on Grammar.net's blog got pretty rough so Grammar.net has removed all comments from those posts about DQing the blogs. No explanation is now available. However, one of the blogs that got DQed was accusing the other blog of stuffing the ballot box (so to speak). Cheating to win a grammar blog contest seems on par with an article I read a while back on the steroid problem in chess competitions. Oh well.

I've given more space than I ought to on the scandal side. Let's look at out winners:

1st Place: a cLiL to cLiMB with a whopping 3,374 votes.

I've already rated them in a previous post. Congrats to them, but I don't see it.
2nd Place: Grammar Girl with a total of 2,673 votes.

A great blog. I'll be reviewing this one next time I get a chance.

3rd Place: Arrant Pedantry with a close 2,209 votes.

I know nothing about them. I look forward to visiting this site to check it out.

So there you have it. The 2011 winners of the grammar blog contest. I'll be keeping my eyes on Grammar.net to see if they do this every year.

Jack's Lament

2011-10-26T10:37:00.000-04:00

If you have not seen the movie Nightmare Before Christmas by Tim Burton, you really should. It is not a great movie for little kids, but excellent for middle school age children and older. I'm not suggesting this as a movie to watch in class, just if you have children at home. As far as class goes, there is a particular song in it that is useful for instruction: "Jack's Lament."

A quick bit of background information for those who have never seen the movie. Jack Skellington (pictured to the left) is the Pumpkin King of Halloween Town (every holiday has their own town). He has just had another successful Halloween. He has, once again, won all the praise of the inhabitants of Halloween Town. And he is bored out of his mind. This is the song he sings to express how unhappy he is, even though everything is going great.

Why show this movie in your class? To teach allusion. There are several examples and depending on the level of student that you have, they should be able to pick out most.

Here they are in order as they appear in the song:

Sally, the rag golem is an allusion to Frankenstein's monster. Students might be able to figure that out from the stitch marks.
He is walking through a pet cemetery (Stephen King's Pet Cemetery).
Zero the ghost dog - easy Rudolf allusion
There is a grave stone figure that looks like Mushu from Mulan. If students make that connection, that's great. However, The Nightmare Before Christmas came out in 1993 and Mulan came out in 1998, so no true allusion there.
The horse head tombstone is actually an allusion/pun. It looks like the chess piece knight. Use the homophone reference for night.
You have two versions of the Scream painting by Edvard Muench. One tombstone looks similar to the painting and the other looks similar to the Halloween mask designed after the painting. To really drive it home, he even says that he, "grows so weary of the sound of screams," at the same time that he drapes his arm around one of the tombstones. Students might recognize the tombstone from the movie Scream, which has a mask based on the same painting.
He calls himself Jack, the Pumpkin King. Maybe an allusion or at least a play on the idea of a Jack o' lantern?
As Jack stands in front of the moon, it is a reference back to Tim Burton's Batman, when the batwing flies in front of the moon for a special visual effect.
And of course, the Hamlet allusion as he takes off his skull and holds it to recite "Shakespearean quotations."

O.K., did I miss any? I feel like I did. If you notice any more, please leave a comment so that I can add it to the list. I'll give you full credit!

If you have the movie, you'll find this song starting at about 6:10 and ending at 9:45. If you don't, here is a poor quality You Tube version:

Happy Halloween!

Werewolf Detection

2011-10-21T12:19:00.000-04:00

One of the best things about being an English teacher is that all of myths and legends are in your curriculum. With that in mind and looking at the upcoming holiday, it might be time to pass on some ways to protect your students of a growing problem. Some other teachers of lesser subjects teach things like quadratic equations, dates, the water cycle, how to do the proper push up, and other topics that I'm sure they feel is important. But let's face it, when are you ever going to have your life in jeopardy because you can't conjugate in Spanish? As English teachers, we get to teacher truly useful things: lycanthropes.

Those of you who wish to be strictly English may wish to broach this important, potentially life saving topic by breaking down the word parts to mean wolf man, or were wolf. You could also introduce the word misanthrope (not to be confused with Miss Anthrope of Captain Underpants fame) as hate man, or a person who hates mankind. You could also offer the bonus question to see who can figure out the word boanthrope. Now I know you all have already quickly broken down this word part, so I won't bother to explain it right now. However, if you just want to check to make sure that HCET knows it, then you'll find the answer at the bottom of the page.

Much of the stuff here was researched in an amazing book - The Book of Werewolves, which I bought on the bargain table at Barnes and Noble several years ago. The book was written by Sabine Baring-Gould in 1865 as a serious study of the existence of werewolves. There is even the transcripts of the court case of the Marechal de Rezt, who was tried and found guilty of being a werewolf. There is even a sermon on werewolves. What else do you need? This book has it all!

So, without further delay, here are the top ten ways to detect a werewolf:

1. The Unibrow - most werewolves have them. Be on guard! However this is not a fail safe, since some of the werewolves are tricky and shave the middle part.

2. Fur on the Inside of the Skin - This is a very effective way of determining a werewolf. If you've ever wondered where the fur goes when they are not in lycanthropic form, then wonder no more. I simply goes up under their skin. A Roman platoon once suspected a member of their unit of being a werewolf. They held him down and peeled back his skin. The search all over his body to be sure. they found that the guy was innocent of all charges. Of course, he was dead, but at least his name was cleared.

3. Forget the Moon Thing - That was made up for movie purposes. It is a great visual image, but does not fit into the past legends and sightings.

4. The Ring Finger Is Longer Than the Middle Finger - This is an easy thing to check before you start peeling someone's skin back.

5. Excessive Thirst - Werewolves are always drinking something.

6. An Obsession with Walking Through Graveyards - I wonder if this means Edgar Allen Poe may have been one - he even proposed to a woman in a graveyard.

7. Purple Pee Pee - Yep, werewolves have purple urine. Now looking at someone peeing and checking the color could save your life, however, it could also end it in a men's restroom! Check with care. I also find it disturbing that an image Google search of "purple urine" actually yields 1,780 results. Not all of them are actually urine pictures, but most are! Why would you post that on the internet?

8. A Foul Smell - Of course, that could apply to many a high school freshman! Werewolves have extra sweat glands and the result is that they often smell like hay or horse manure.

9. Look for the Mark of the Werewolf on Their Palm - A dead giveaway. Also be suspicious of anyone wearing gloves constantly, especially those with the fingers cut out.

And finally, the best and most accurate way to tell if someone a werewolf...

10. Shoot Them with a Silver Bullet - if they die, then they were probably a werewolf.

Good hunting!

A boanthrope, of course, is a werecow.

Grammar Blog Re-Review

2011-10-19T06:00:00.001-04:00

A couple of posts ago, I pointed out the Grammar Blog contest. The time for voting has ended now and the winner will be revealed on October 27th. When I mentioned the post, I pointed out that I voted for Mighty Red Pen and then did a quick review of the two leading blogs, Terribly Write and a cLiL to cLiMB. Starting now, when I review sites, I'll grade them as a rating. If I were to grade those two, I would have given a cLiL to cLiMB with a C+ and Terribly Write with a D for the typo in a post blasting Yahoo News for typos.

However, I am re-reviewing Terribly Write. Why? Well I did only view one post and seeing that Terribly Write has a few thousand votes, it would seem that maybe I picked a bad day. Added to the fact that Laura, the blogger, left me my first comment on this blog, I felt that a second chance was in order.

The blog is about mistakes and typos found in Yahoo News. I'm not quite sure why she only picks Yahoo News. I have no problems with it, however. There seems to be an endless supply of typos in this news organization. As Laura told me, a news organization that big and respected ought to have a better sense of proofreading.

Personally, I would like more variety to check on this blog on a regular basis, but this blog can be a very useful blog for the classroom. Laura is a prolific poster. If I put up three posts in a week, I feel productive. She, on the other hand, puts up three or more a day. The best thing is that it is all current.

Why is that good? As a teacher, I can look at her blog to find some Yahoo typos. Then I can pull up the article in class on the projector and have the students try to find the mistake themselves. This could be a handy classroom starter and a great practice for proofreading.

I also find it funny that this crusade against Yahoo has not changed the Yahoo writers. It seems that the editors there just don't care. I'm sure that they have been made aware of this blog.

The absolute best thing about the blog is that Laura responds to every comment. She really cares about where this blog is going. She also not only replied to me on her blog, but she looked up my blog and read my post too. I don't know if she liked the blog or not, but she took the time to reply. Replies make a blogger's day.

However, The first post I looked at had another typo in it. In this case, she accidentally used two colons in stead of one. Now I know how easy it is to make typos and I am not going to say that I never make them. Proofreading these days is too easy with spell check and we tend to forget to actually read our work. Laura puts out many posts a day and it is inevitable that she will have a typos here and there. The problem I have is that the whole point of her blog is to point out typos in others, so she needs to be extra vigilant.

I found it interesting the sniping and accusations going on the comments section of the post for the contest. Read them yourself at: http://terriblywrite.wordpress.com/2011/10/16/be-sure-to-vote-for-your-favorite-grammar-blog/#comments. It gave some background information on the contest and voting process, but it was too much drama going on in the posting. I get my fill of drama in the lives of my students. I was a bit turned off by the comment, "I’d hate to lose to a blog of a lesser quality than Terribly Write." That seemed unnecessary. The point of contention centered around a vote spike of about 5,000 votes for both Terribly Write and The Diacritics. One of the guys from The Diacritics posted a comment negative about Terribly Write and then Laura responded back. It was just a mess and a turn off.

When I checked on the results of the contest today, I clicked the "view results" link. Both sites are not on the results list. I wonder if both have been removed for ballot stuffing. I'm not suggesting that either parties are guilty. Just wondering.

New Grade - After a better look at the site and weighing the pros and cons and factoring the possible usefulness of the class, I'll give it a:

C+

Frankenstein Allusion

2011-10-18T05:28:00.001-04:00

This weekend I finally got around to watching X-Men First Class. I was very impressed with the movie for a variety of reasons. One was the characterizations. They were dealing with established characters but wanted to show how they were different when they were younger. They did a fantastic job showing this while not leaving me thinking that doesn't seem like that guy. There were different actors, yet I completely bought that they were the characters I watched in earlier movies. The movie had some violent scenes, yet was not gory at all. In fact, you don't even see blood until the end, and even then it is minimized and used to show one character's descent into villainy. It was a superhero movie, but it focused on story, not powers. The threat in the movie is the Cuban missile crisis, which I also thought was a nice touch. All in all, I highly recommend this movie if you are in the least bit a comic book fan.

Being an English teacher nerd, one of my favorite scenes was this one with a perfect Frankenstein allusion. In this scene, we have a guy who will later become the villain Magneto. He can control metal. He is also a Jew who survived the holocaust. In earlier scenes, the movie showed how the Nazis killed his mother and then experimented on him because of his powers. Now that he is grown, he is tracking down Nazis and killing them. Here is a scene where he tracked down three of them in an Argentina bar. It is the last line that has the perfect allusion. Warning it is violent, just not graphic. Depending on the maturity level of your class, this might even be a useful scene to show in class. You would have to be the judge of that. I'm sharing it not as a lesson idea, but as one English teacher to another.

X-Men Magneto Argentina Bar Scene from Bob Cavazos on Vimeo.

If you are teaching Frankenstein, feel free to use my class page. I did not finish the study questions, but you could make a class assignment to come up with good questions for those final chapters. If the students send them to me, I might put them up on the site. It is here: http://www.lordalford.com/frankenstein/frankenstein.htm

It's Time to Vote!

2011-10-14T16:13:00.001-04:00

No, not for political office, for the The Best Grammar Blog of 2011!

Personally, I voted for Mighty Red Pen. I have not viewed all these blogs, but I plan to soon. I did look at the first two. I was not at all impressed by Terribly Write, the current leader. Since this blog is leading by about 1,000 votes at the time of this posting, I am willing to believe that maybe I just happened on an off day. The blog poster had ridiculed Yahoo News for a typo in the spelling of Hillary Clinton's name, but then had a typo herself by accidentally spelling "do" as "to". Oh well. I'm not casting any stones, mind you. It is way too easy to let something slip by; however, as she was making fun of someone else at the time...

The current second place blog is a cLiL to cLiMB. It was O.K. It had the advantage of being reader inspired. Readers send in questions and he or she answered them. The ads all over the place were distracting, though. I'm sure there is a reason for the odd title. I just don't know what it is.

Check them out for yourself. Maybe you'll like them better than I did. I know I'll check back as well. Maybe I'll post all their links on here soon. I don't. that sounds like a lot of work and I am terribly lazy.

I'll be checking out the others as time goes by. If you know of a good grammar blog that we should consider voting for, then let me know! Voting ends October 17th. Click HERE to vote.

Hamlet II

2011-10-13T05:58:00.001-04:00

From Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal

1001 Arabian Nights Lesson Ideas

2011-10-11T15:44:00.000-04:00

There are many things you can do with the Arabian Nights. The nice thing is, that since it is a frame story, you would not have to teach the whole book. You can teach sections as you wish to teach them. Integrate this as a part of a short story unit. Use it as a week long or a few days long mini unit to fill in time. Assign it as an extra credit assignment. I use it as an EOC prep unit. The EOC is our state test that for ninth grade English will be a reading comprehension test. Now that we are moving to Common Core Standards, this test will go away. If you want to use it to prepare a kid for reading comprehension questions, feel free to steal and alter mine. They can be found at: http://www.lordalford.com/9grade/arabiannights/an.htm

I got the stories with permission to use them from Candle Light Stories. You can have access to all of their Arabian Nights stories at: http://www.candlelightstories.com/storybooks/the-arabian-nights/

If you feel the need to teach frame story and you just don't want to hit Canterbury Tales then this a good alternative. So is The Illustrated Man, but that will be saved for a future post. The frame story in a nut shell is that the sultan had a bad experience with his wife. She betrayed him and he had to have her strangled as the law stated. This drove him crazy and he decided that all women must be evil (logical conclusion). His solution was to marry a woman each night and have her strangled in the morning before she could have a chance to be unfaithful. This goes on for several nights. Many women are killed until Scheherazade is married to the sultan. Being considerably smarter, she does not try to win the sultan over on the wedding night. Instead, she tells him stories. She always leaves off at the climax making the sultan decide to keep her alive one more night to hear the end of the story. However, she moves right on into the next story and again leaves off at the climax. In this way, she gets to live and no more girls are strangled.

You could use this question as an allusion lesson or just an extra credit question. Try it yourself. If you get it right, you get a no prize!

The answer will be at the bottom of the post.

Since the stories stop at the climax, it would be a great tool for teaching the plot line or let the kids practice their prediction skills.

There is a pretty good movie for this story made by Hallmark. In fact, it is probably the best Hallmark movie ever made (I'm not a huge Hallmark fan, so I may not be the best judge). Here is the trailer for it:

Supposedly there is a new movie version to be released in 2013, bu they've been talking about that one for years now and it doesn't seem like it will ever actually get made. This type of story line would probably be a much better TV series than a movie anyway. Speaking of the movie, here is a good author's purpose question to go with it that I used on a daily EOC question blog. Still a good question whether you have the EOC or not:
http://dailyeoc.blogspot.com/2010/10/october-15-2010.html

When you watch the Aladdin story, you may be a bit surprised to see that Aladdin is Chinese. That is how it is in the book. The story is still different than the book, but it is closer than what we think. A decent assignment may be to incorporate the Aladdin story with the Disney cartoon Aladdin. Several similarities and differences in them. For that matter, there are several Sinbad movies and of course seven Sinbad tales in the book.

While you're at it, there is the obvious journal prompt of what would you wish for if you had unlimited wishes like Aladdin (oh yeah, there are no three wish limitations in the real deal).

If you want to incorporate the Disney movie, but do not want to spend all that time in class showing the whole movie, then you could show the "Prince Ali" song.

This version is a little longer than needed, but the shorter version was such bad quality, I didn't want to include it. I use this song as part of a context clues assignment for lower level students. Each student is given a copy of the lyrics (you can find them at: http://www.fpx.de/fp/Disney/Lyrics/Aladdin.html#Prince Ali) and a chart with several words lifted right out of the song that I figured they wouldn't know (for example: coterie, menagerie, warble, hordes, alluring). They watch the video, then I give them the chart with three columns. The first column has the words I want them to figure out. The second column if for guesses. The third column is for looking the word up. I let them watch it one more time, this time trying to figure out what the words mean. They must come up with a guess for each one. For lower level students, getting them to put a guess down is very difficult. They do not want to get it wrong and they feel that if they do not put anything down, they didn't really get it wrong. I try to explain that if you strike out but never swung the bat, you're still out, but they don't get it. Once they have guessed all ten words, then they bring it up to me. If their guess is close enough that I know they have a basic understanding of what was meant, then I put a check in the definition column. If the guess is completely wrong, I do not penalize. Once I have checked their ten guesses, I give them back the paper and then they look up all the words that they didn't get a check for. That way, there is no penalty for wrong guesses, but there is the added bonus for a correct guess. That takes some of the pressure off and really works their context clues skills. THIS WORKS GREAT!

_______________________________________________________
The answer to the trivia question?

See the lamp and lantern connection? Plus when he started, he had an awful costume! If you got it right, our high tech computer software will track you down and send you a coveted no-prize.

I'm sure there are a 1001 other ideas that could be used on this story. If you've taught this book or parts of it before, then I would love to hear about it.

Thor, Percy Jackson Style

2011-10-10T06:35:00.000-04:00

The author of The Lightning Thief has already brought Greek mythology (Olympians series), Roman Mythology (Lost Hero series), and Egyptian mythology (Kane series) to life for modern day students. He is not done. There are already plans in the works for a Norse mythology series. In fact, Disney Publications Worldwide have already negotiated a contract. Just don't get too excited yet. Rick Riordan says that the first book won't be ready until at least 2015.

Steve Job's Speech

2011-10-07T06:00:00.003-04:00

Many of you have heard that Steve Jobs, founder of Apple, passed away this week. You may have also heard of the graduation speech he gave shortly before dying. I'm thinking that if you include speeches in your class, this would be a good one to add to your collection. Here are two quotes from the speech:

"Again, you can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life"

"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary."

You can read the whole speech or watch it on a 15 minute video at the link below.
http://news.stanford.edu/news/2005/june15/jobs-061505.html

Better Book Titles

2011-10-06T03:36:00.000-04:00

There is a website that is right up an English teacher's alley - Better Book Titles. The guy who runs it takes an existing book and gives it a better title. The results are often very funny. He has several now. I would say that about one in ten is really good. You have to wade through some meh ones to get to the good ones, but when you get that good one, it is worth it.

Here are the some of the ones I think are on the more funny side:

Original title: What to Expect When Your Expecting

Original title: The Dictionary

Original title: Mien Kampf

Original title: The Killing of Mr. Griffin

If you are unfamiliar with this title, then you should know it is about some students who kill their English teacher because he is too hard on them. I always take extra note when a student checks that book out of my classroom library!

Original title: Huckleberry Finn

Original title: Moby Dick

Original title: Oedipus Rex

Original title: Paradise Lost

Original title: The Scarlet Letter

This is my personal favorite.

Original title: Elements of Style

You can see the rest at www.betterbooktitles.com.

~

The Graphic Novel

2011-10-04T14:56:00.004-04:00

If I were to ask you your opinion of the graphic novel or comic books in the classroom, how would you respond?

Why do comic books have a negative stereotype? Read on my friends.

*****Warning: History Content Below*****

It is because of this man: Dr. Fredric Wertham.

Why? Well because Dr. Wertham wrote a book about juvenile delinquency. He used his powers of psychology to determine that juvenile delinquency was not caused by bad parenting, genes, or any factors like that. No. It was all about kids reading comic books. A kid reads one of those trashy things and they'll want to go out and commit crimes and random acts of violence. If they read Superman, they may jump out a window to try to fly (some might would say that's just evolution in play). If they read Batman and Robin, they might grow up to be homosexual pedophiles (no kidding, that was brought up). The book came out in 1954 and caused quite a stir. The U.S. Senate held a committee hearing on the validity of the book's claims. Of course, much of this would have been settled if parents had just checked on what their child was reading or buying, but well...

You can see how awful comics are in this informational video:

I like the look on the little boy's face when he holds that rock and starts to eye the other little boy's head. That's what happens when kids read comics.

The comic publishing world quickly tried to get things under control for fear of being shut down by the U.S. government. They created the Comics Code Authority, a group that reviewed the comics and placed a seal of approval on them if it passed the rules.

The rules were pretty restrictive. The following examples came from http://www.comicartville.com/comicscode.htm. You can go there to see all the rules if you want (there are quite a few).

Crimes shall never be presented in such a way as to create sympathy for the criminal, to promote distrust of the forces of law and justice, or to inspire others with a desire to imitate criminals.
In every instance good shall triumph over evil and the criminal punished for his misdeeds.
No unique or unusual methods of concealing weapons shall be shown.
The letters of the word "crime" on a comics magazine shall never be appreciably greater than the other words contained in the title. The word "crime" shall never appear alone on a cover.
No comics magazine shall use the word horror or terror in its title.
Scenes dealing with, or instruments associated with walking dead, torture, vampires and vampirism, ghouls, cannibalism and werewolfism are prohibited.
Although slang and colloquialisms are acceptable, excessive use should be discouraged and wherever possible good grammar shall be employed.
All characters shall be depicted in dress reasonably acceptable to society.
Divorce shall not be treated humorously nor represented as desirable.
Respect for parents, the moral code, and for honorable behavior shall be fostered.
Good taste shall be the guiding principle in the acceptance of advertising.
Advertising for the sale of fireworks is prohibited.

The code caused many publishing companies to just go out of business since they specialized in horror or crime comics. The most notable there was a company called EC Comics. Marvel almost went out of business. That was when Stan Lee decided to tell the stories that he wanted to. He figured, I can't get fired, we're about to close up anyway. So he wrote the Fantastic Four. It was a hit. He followed it up with heroes like The Hulk, Spider-Man, Daredevil, and others. The superhero comic was back and everyone jumped back on board.

Today, nobody uses it. Marvel took up their own system in 2001 and DC and Archie Comics did the same in 2011. However, the damage was done. Many of us got a negative image of comic books from our parents. Why? Because they lived through this. They were told not to touch that trash. They were told that it's not real reading. They were told that only the slow kids should read those and if their kids did, it would dumb them down and reduce their reading ability.

***** History Content Over *****

Now that we are adults, what do many of us do? Pass on the same outdated information. Do you remember "The Lottery" by Shirley Jackson? The theme there is why do we do what we do? Is it because it has value or is it because "We've always had a lottery!" I love Old Man Warner, but his viewpoint is not the greatest.

So, do comics cause juvenile delinquency? Nah. They got rid of the horror and crime comics and bad kids still did bad things. Imagine that. So if the reasons we look down on comics is a falsehood, maybe we should take the time to look at why they should be considered for the classroom.

To start with, stop thinking superhero when you think comic. While superhero stories currently dominant the market, there are plenty of other good topics. Also, not all comics or graphic novels are the same level of literature. I would not try to say that every grocery store romance novel is on par with Hamlet. However, not all romance novels are bad literature either, I'm just picking on them. (For a kick, try out http://worldoflongmire.com/features/romance_novels/ so see romance books retitled.) So with that in mind, we can have bad books and good books. We can also have bad comics and good comics.

So what makes a good graphic novel or comic book? The writer and the artist. A good comic uses both the words and the image to tell the story. When you have that, you can create some awesome works. Writer Scot McCloud wrote an interesting breakdown on the medium of comics in his book Understanding Comics: the Invisible Art. He breaks it down as any college professor might break down epic poetry or the novel form. To prove his point on the versatility of the comic medium, he writes the entire book using the comic form.

Graphic novels are starting become popular, but they are not quite mainstream yet. Currently there are three types of graphic novels on the market. The first type is the trade paper back. This is a collection of issues from a comic book series. Typically they tell one story. It is hard to find a comic book that tells one story nowadays. Typically the monthly comic book takes about six issues to tell a story. Those six issues later get reprinted as a trade paperback. There's nothing wrong with that, it's just that the story will be chopped into pieces. It's much like how Charles Dickens wrote.

A good example is Runaways: Pride and Joy by Marvel. It is intended to target the teen lit crowd and came out in individual issues, but the trade paperback is what really sells. In fact, this particular one won't usually be found in the graphic novels section of your book store. Instead it will be found in the teen lit section. It's a good read. I recommend it.

Another type is the adaptation of a novel. There are several good ones out there. There are also several that are no good. Here is what is going on. Educational publishers and book publishers are realizing that there is a market out there for graphic novels. They also realize that teachers and school librarians are more likely to buy an adaptation of a classic before they buy anything else. Sometimes the publishers see this as a way to make a few extra bucks and not produce a good story. They figure that since the story has already been written, all they need to get is a decent artist. Unfortunately, it takes a particular kind of writer to adapt a story into graphic novel form. The artist also needs to be a story teller since the words and art must work together for good flow. Otherwise you just end up with an illustrated story. That's usually not good. Many of the graphic novels you have in your classroom or school library fit this bill.

James Patterson wrote several books for young adults. When they adapted them to graphic novel form, they got it right. The plot is still James Patterson's, but they brought in NaRae Lee to write it. This works great in the classroom for supplemental reading especially. I can hardly keep mine checked in. Currently they have three volumes of the Maximum Ride series and only one that I know of in the Witch and Wizard series. The Alex Rider series is actually better in graphic novel form than in its original novel form.

The other type of graphic novel is the one that is written as such. Not as a collection, not as an adaptation. There are not nearly as many of these as there will be later. The voyage of the graphic novel is much like that of cable TV series. Many cable TV series feel that now that they are free of network restrictions they need to put as much controversial material, adult language, and sex scenes as they can. Many graphic novels are doing that as well. You need to be careful when choosing these and remember that they are not children's books just because they are comic books. A good example of what a graphic novel can really be as literature is The Pride of Baghdad. This is an excellent book to have in your classroom, provided that you have mature students. It does have a few violent scenes and there are some hints at adult situations. The story is taken from a headline shortly after the Iraq Shock and Awe campaign. Some lions had escaped from the zoo after the zoo got bombed. This is their story.

So, don't dismiss comics anymore just because you've been told they are not real literature. My son and I were at a book store when he told me that a teacher told him he wasn't allowed to read the Stormbreaker graphic novel in class. He was only allowed to read real books. I was about to tell him that he needs to listen to his teacher and he can read the graphic novel at home, but before I was able to, a lady nearby said, "Young man, I'm a librarian at Duke and we have a lot of graphic novels. You tell your teacher that I said that we would not stock trash. We stock real books!" I don't know if my son relayed that information or not! Find some graphic novels for yourself. I'm sure you have a good selection in your public library. You may even have a good selection in your school library, if you're librarian is half the librarian that mine is (You rock Dr. T!). They're not for everyone, but that's O.K. Neither are odes or epic poetry.

Leave me your thoughts on if you agree or disagree. Also leave a comment to tell me more good titles.

Pun of the Day

2011-09-29T10:08:00.000-04:00

I do not give homework often. I just don't like it. When I do, I write the assignment on the board on a spot specifically designed for it and for upcoming due dates. However, students do not tend to pay attention to the board. Now I could just say that I provided students with the reminder of the assigned dates and make them take responsibility for not paying more attention, but that's just a CYA maneuver and not worthy of a hard core teacher (just a plain old common one). So I make the board more dynamic. Students look at ti more and there is more chance that they will see the reminders that they need. How do I make the board more dynamic? One way is the Pun of the Day!

I have a sheet that I print out each year with several of my more favorite puns. Students love to see if they "get" it. Now they look at the board each day plus they soon learn the literary term pun and many try to get their own put up on the board. All around it is a pretty good process.

Below are some of my favorite puns:

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Why was Piglet looking in the toilet? He was looking for Pooh!
When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
It's better to love a short girl than not a tall.
If you don't pay your exorcist you get repossessed.
To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
She had a boyfriend with a wooden leg, but broke it off.
Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
A cardboard belt would be a waist of paper.
He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
Math teachers have lots of problems.
When the electricity went off during a storm at a school the students were de-lighted.
How do you make antifreeze? Steal her blanket.
If you leave alphabet soup on the stove and go out, it could spell disaster.
He collects mouthwash bottles, and they're all in mint condition.
He avoided funerals because he was not a mourning person.
A guy went to a costume party dressed as a knife, and he really looked sharp.

If you think these were punny, I've got several more to share! Good sites to go to for puns are:

www.punoftheday.com

www.pungents.com

www.thatspunny.blogspot.com

Enjoy!

Romeo and Juliet Allusions

2011-09-27T11:17:00.002-04:00

I continue to call the 1996 version of Romeo and Juliet the new movie, even though it is older than my students. It is not my favorite and often my students start to like the older version better. One of the things I do like about it is that the makers of this movie really liked Shakespeare. For one, they made sure to edit the movie to exactly two hours long since the prologue says, "Is now the two hours' traffic of our stage" Another reason I know that they really liked Shakespeare is the effort that they put into the background. Look at these allusions to Shakespeare plays:

"Experience is by industry achiev'd"

The Two Gentlemen of Verona

A play on the title of a Shakespeare play - The Merchant of Venice

"Out, damn’d spot! out, I say!"

Macbeth spoken by Lady Macbeth when she can't seem to get imaginary blood off her hands.

"I need not add more fuel to your fire,

For well I wot ye blaze to burn them out"

King Henry VI part 3

"Sir John, I am thy Pistol and thy friend…"

Henry IV, Part 2

"Such stuff as dreams are made on."

The Tempest spoken by the character Prospero

"Methinks the truth should live from age to age, as ‘twere retail’d to all posterity"

Richard III

O.K., not a quote, but you can tell your kids to look for the Globe Theater and see who finds it first.

Shylock is a rich character in The Merchant of Venice.

"O that I were a god, to shoot forth thunder upon these paltry, servile, abject drudges!"

King Henry VI part 2

There are several quotes here. I got these pictures and quotes from my own research (http://www.lordalford.com/9grade/romeo/new.htm) but then I found a site that had already done most of the work at Shakespeare Marketing (http://www.bohemiancinema.com/writes/shakespearean-marketing/). You can find all the quotes on the magazines (below) there plus a few more background images. If you like this, you should check it out.

Your Google Is Not My Google

2011-09-26T14:51:00.000-04:00

My media center specialist sent me this video the other day. Google has an amazing filter system. Watch this video:

Now on one hand, this is truly amazing! My searches take me less time because of those 350,000 possible sites out there, Google is going to show me the ones it thinks I'll like based on what I have been viewing.

On the other hand, if it is not a personal computer, then the sites are all off. Take the library of your school for instance. The filter there is all messed up and a kid might have a hard time finding the right link.

My guy in the MC leans toward this to have more negative consequences than positive. I think I am of the other persuasion. Both of us would like the ability to turn it off if we choose to. What about you? What are your thoughts on this matter?

How Ironic

2011-09-23T13:59:00.000-04:00

Students often think that understanding irony is difficult. Using pictures is often a good way to get the point across. Here are some good examples of situational irony: